Honey Words

"Kind words are like honey-- sweet to the soul and healthy for the body."  

Prov 16:24

I noticed them at the beginning of the year - the words of my children - smashing, slashing at each other, at me.  The words flew like spiteful daggers, aimed to kill.  And they hit their mark.

I told them to stop.  I punished them.  But, like an epidemic, it spread rampant and worsened.  Until I realized that I, too, was infected.  In fact, I might have been the carrier.  I didn't know.

Nothing I tried worked.  Until God gave me a verse...I started seeing it everywhere. The honey verse.  Our family talked about words being like honey and how honey makes you smile, and makes you want more.  How honey words are good.

My kids tried it and they liked it.  That verse stuck.  Nothing I had tried did, but God's word worked in their hearts, and in mine.

My littlest daughter put a name to words that are not honey words, "coffee words" (a simile I appreciate since she and I are on the same page in our opinion of the taste of coffee).  So, although not completely biblical, we now have reference to honey words and coffee words in our house.

In thinking about honey words, another verse came to mind:

"A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart.                               For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of."  
Luke 6:45

My words speak my heart.  

Coffee words spew forth from a dark heart.

Honey words ooze out of a sweet heart.

One of my sons struggles especially with his value.  He thinks he's worthless and unloved and he expresses it regularly.  I told him to stop.  I told him it's untrue.  I've angsted about it.

But only this last week did it come to me that he has bought the lie.  The lie fills his heart and flows out of his mouth.

My job is to show him truth.  It doesn't matter how often I tell him to stop speaking untrue words, or how often I tell him he's wrong, or how much I worry about it.  He needs to know and believe the truth.  The truth needs to infiltrate the lies until he sees them for what they are: dirty, old, rotten, coffee-lies.

And so I've been whispering honey words into his ear as often as I can.  I sing songs to him about how wonderful he is.  I squeeze his hand, look him in the eye, and speak the truth in love to him.

When he spews out his coffee-insecurities, I will rebut them with honey words of truth until he believes them.

But, you know what I've learned from this?

I'm really, really bad at saying honey words.  I mean, I have to really, really work at it.

Coffee words, however, come naturally.  

Oh, the black reflection of my own heart!

I pray for God to give me the discernment to see opportunity to pour honey words.  More importantly, I pray that my heart might become honey-filled so that it might flow forth more naturally.

Because, when I speak them, their faces light up!  The joy comes forth!  The contagiousness alights a new kind of epidemic.  They love me!  They hug me!  They speak those words back.  They smile so sweetly.  

A transformation from the angry roll-out of our home just a few months ago.  God is good!  His word changes hearts.